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Toni Braxton! You are a blessed, and lucky man! Oh, and I enjoyed your reference to being bourgie. You were being whimsical which I dig. And besides, if the shoe fits for you and for me.... I understand the sympathy.

As I oftentimes say, if there are over 40 million black Americans, there are over 40 million life stories, experiences and perspectives. I love that you are bringing out the nuance and complexity for our readers. It is a good thing. We need more thoughtful reflection on all of the beauty and messiness and love that binds us to each other and yet respects our individual humanity. I really sort of observe life as it passes my by and I make creative associations as you do as well.

For example, what were the odds that I would be listening to Toni Braxton and be swept away in my mood only to encounter the marker for Blackness in my adult life, Jack and Jill. Highly unlikely and yet it happened. And of course, the world is a small place which allows for my rift into the intimacy of a life on the color line.

I love your "close to the bones" reflection. There are layers and layers to affinity. That's life, while we adopt a loose identity at the end of the day. I am not a joiner or a group kind of guy. So, kissing the ring doesn't work for me but it might for other people and that's great for them.

I could go on and on in this reply. But time draws to a close. What I love in your comment is felt recognition that identity is best worn loose. I love to observe from a distance, like a brother from another planet, and write about this marvelous moment your and I are living in. Your comment was much appreciated. And feel free to call "Mr. Brooks Brothers" me bourgie. Labels are fun to play around with. We get in trouble when we forget one thing -- labels are not arguments.

Please consider my above response a Stoic Observation/smile.

P.S. -- My wife wasn't Toni Braxton (you lucky guy) but she was the most beautiful girl in the world when we first met. February 24, 1989, Rayburn Office Building Elevator, Circa 5:00 p.m. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FuXbKLiW1UI

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Here is my sweetheart. https://flic.kr/p/2n1XaYz

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And here is my sweetheart 33 years ago to the day....

C:\Users\winkf\Downloads\IMG_6144.jpg

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I tell you this -- sometimes it is the smallest gesture that can move people to stand and applaud with profound feeling. We saw the small gesture yesterday at Yeshiva. Nothing I can write will match the humanity of the smallest of gesture, the removal of a hood.

"I love me some him." People will know the things I have witnessed in life, the stroll by the harbor, the comfort of an island library, the touch of Black Enterprise magazine from my youth, the melting away of Blackness on the tropical island somewhere out there in the great ocean of humanity. So, thanks for your comment that keeps me going day after day after day after day. Together, we will create a vault of the human condition over the days, weeks and months. I will bring into existence moments like the Burbank Happening, my time in New Haven, my love for close family, people from another planet/smile. And at the end of the day, missing Star Trek and The Twilight Zone will have been worth it.

Godspeed and love life. When I write, I write beyond dogma and slogan words.

I write life.

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OK. This is complicated, on the other hand it is not. I wasn't accusing you of being bourgie. I was sympathizing with you, being bourgie myself. I have for a number of complex reasons having to do with my ambiguity regarding the distinction between race and culture, opted out of the Talented Tenth. In otherwords, in my recognition of black diversity, I refused to represent the black race. Not having actually joined Jack & Jill (my wife didn't wanna), I can only guess their presumptions. I have thus ignored them the way they ignore me.

And yet, I grew up with Our Kind of People in exactly the way I went to Catholic schools without actually being Catholic, in exactly the way my best friends are PhDs without having one myself. I simply haven't gone through the formal process and kissed the appropriate rings. In that way I am an asshole, and I'll own that. But I do claim the Old School, and I have my own bona fides in that regard.

I guess it's most appropriate to say that within Our Kind of People, some types are closer than others and for some I have genuine love. This comes very close to my bones. I leave you with Baldwin.

Identity would seem to be the garment with which one covers the nakedness of the self: in which case, it is best that the garment be loose, a little like the robes of  the desert, through which robes one's nakedness can always be felt, and, sometimes, discerned. This trust in one's nakedness is all that gives one the power to change one's robes.

-- James Baldwin.

I'm that naked dude over there code switching my 'drobe.

BTW. If you saw my wife when she was my girlfriend, you'd have a hard time telling her apart from Toni Braxton. I'm the luckiest man in the world.

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You have taught be about another group of people I was unaware of. However, I will say that I’ve gotten annoyed for a long time that blacks are constantly portrayed as “lower class,” when there are plenty of middle class. We have similar goals, joys and frustrations. We are mostly just people, living our lives. Advertising is reflecting more of that, but the news media and politicians haven’t seemed to have gotten the message.

John Fetterman has amazed me. I’m not a Democrat, and obviously, not progressive. I had my doubts about him initially, and I honestly was concerned that he was being pushed too hard while recovering from his stroke. But, he has not only recovered, he has made me realize how fortunate we all are that he stayed, and has had the courage to speak out against certain beliefs in ways that don’t always make him popular.

Thanks, as always. Hope you have a pleasant weekend. ❤️

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